
Unbelievable Brussels Luxury: Hotel Des Colonies Mercure Review (You Won't Believe #3!)
Unbelievable Brussels Luxury: Hotel Des Colonies Mercure Review (You Won't Believe #3!) - Seriously, This Place Is… Something. (Brace Yourself!)
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because this review of the Hotel Des Colonies Mercure in Brussels is not going to be your typical, bland, travel blog drivel. I'm going to be brutally honest. I'm talking raw, unedited, "I just downed a Brussels waffle and I need to share this" kind of honest. And trust me, after my stay, my emotions swung wildly between "Oh my god, this is divine!" and "Wait… is that a rogue, suspiciously large Brussels sprout rolling under the bed?". You've been warned.
First things first: Accessibility & Safety - Because We Gotta Address the Elephant in the Room (And Brussels, Let's Be Real)
Accessibility: Okay, let's start with the practicalities. Being a clumsy individual myself, I'm always checking for ramps and elevators. The Hotel Des Colonies claims to be accessible. They say they cater to guests with disabilities. I’m going to give them a generous score here because… well, Brussels cobblestones are a hazard on their own. The elevators were fine, but navigating the public areas with a wheelchair, or even just crutches, felt like an Olympic sport in some parts. The staff seemed genuinely helpful if you needed it. So, yeah, a qualified thumbs up here. (Overall: Mostly good, but Brussels itself demands a level of physical agility!)
Cleanliness & Safety: My Inner Germaphobe Calmed Down (Mostly). This is where they really shine. Brussels, like any major city, has its moments, but the hotel was spotlessly clean. I mean, I'm talking "Did they hire the cleaning crew from a CSI episode?" clean. Anti-viral cleaning products? Check. Staff trained in safety protocol? Double-check. They had all the sanitizing bells and whistles, which, in this day and age, is a major plus. They even had those little hand sanitizer stations everywhere. Everywhere. It was almost overwhelming, but honestly? It reassured me. I'm a nervous flyer AND a health-nut, so having some security here was welcomed. (Conclusion: A+ for cleanliness and safety. They take it seriously).
The Intriguing Absence of "Pets Allowed": You know, I'm a dog person. But I also understand that hotels need to consider allergens and whatnot. Still, the complete absence of pets allowed felt a little… sterile? Or maybe it's just a Brussels thing to be a little guarded about anything living? (Neutral observation, but made me think).
The Room: My Kingdom for Blackout Curtains (and a Decent Bed!)
The Essentials: Okay, let's get the basics out of the way. Free Wi-Fi? Check. Air conditioning? Check. And, hallelujah, Blackout curtains?! HELL YEAH! (Seriously, I need those). The bed? Comfortable, but not mind-blowing. Standard hotel fare. The bathroom was functional. Adequate toiletries. I couldn't complain. The in-room safe box was a nice touch, which made me feel like an international superspy on a budget.
The Quirks: My room had a delightful view of… the adjacent building. Which, let's be honest, is pretty standard for Brussels. Also, the hair dryer was a relic from the stone age. But hey, it worked. And the little slippers?! I love hotel slippers! These ones were… okay. Not the plush, fluffy kind. More the "utility" kind. But again, I’m grateful. The coffee/tea maker was a lifesaver in the morning. The fact that there was a bathtub made me excited! And it did the job. The fridge was nice for keeping my water cold.
The Small Stuff Matters: The desk was a decent size for getting some work done, the reading light was functional. I appreciate these little details.
Dining, Drinking & Snacking: From "Meh" to "Magnificent Waffle!"
Breakfast: The Buffet Battle (and the Waffle Victory!) The breakfast buffet? Let's just say it was extensive. There were pastries, cereals, cheeses, meats, the usual suspects. But… it lacked a certain je ne sais quoi. It felt a bit… mass-produced. The coffee was… well, it was coffee. Nothing to write home about. BUT! Then… then I stumbled upon the Belgian waffles they were making. And holy moly. That's where the magic happened. Fresh, warm, topped with whipped cream and… well, I won't bore you with the details. Let's just say, I may have (definitely) gone back for seconds (and thirds… and maybe a sneaky fourth). (Waffles: 10/10. Buffet: 6/10).
The Restaurant: A Mixed Bag of Flavors: They offer international cuisine that's good, not spectacular. There's a bar which I did enjoy for a nightcap. I sampled some items from their a la carte menu. The food was decent, but nothing that completely bowled me over. The salad in restaurant wasn't great.
Happy Hour!: Yes, they had it. It was a lifesaver. Poolside bar was awesome. Snack bar was perfect for late night cravings.
Pool, Sauna, Fitness… Oh My! (Or, Did I Even Have Time?)
The Pool with a View: It was pretty, I’ll give it that. And yes, the pool was a welcome sight. But (there's always a but, isn't there?)… I was so busy exploring Brussels, I barely had time to take a dip. Blame the delicious waffles.
The Rest: I peeked into the fitness center but it looked like a standard hotel gym. The spa/sauna/steam room looked tempting, but time, oh, time! I guess you can't get it all.
Services & Conveniences: The Good, The Quirky, and the "Huh?"
The Usual Suspects: 24-hour front desk? Yep. Concierge? Indeed. Laundry and dry cleaning? You bet. They had the basics covered. Daily housekeeping? Absolutely.
The "Huh?" Moments: Cash withdrawal? Okay, that makes sense. Currency exchange? Brussels is a major international hub. Gift/souvenir shop? Tourist central, right? But… Shrine? I'm not sure what the shrine was. It was hidden and not mentioned anywhere, so I can't comment.
The Conveniences I Adored: Free car park?! Absolutely! My budget and I appreciate that. Also, Elevator? Excellent!
Business Facilities : They had a meeting room. A projector and LED display. Meeting stationery. They could help me.
Getting Around: Navigating Brussels (The Good, The Bad, and the Cobblestones)
- Airport transfer? Yes, they arranged it. Super convenient.
- Taxi? Easily available.
- Car park on-site? And it's free!
Overall Impression: Good, But Not Quite Love at First Sight… With a Few Quirky Brussels Touches That Made It Memorable.
The Hotel Des Colonies Mercure is a solid choice for a visit to Brussels. It's clean, safe, and generally well-equipped. The staff were friendly and helpful. The waffles were a revelation. However, it lacked that certain "wow" factor that would elevate it to "unforgettable."
The imperfections, the "huh?" moments, and the occasional Brussels quirkiness actually made it more endearing. It wasn't perfect, but it was real.
My Recommendation:
For whom? Definitely great for business travelers, those who appreciate cleanliness, and anyone who adores Belgian waffles.
For who it's not for? Luxury snobs who demand perfection. Also, possibly those with mobility issues.
Would I go back? Absolutely, if only for those waffles. And to see if I can decipher what's up with that shrine…
Final Score: A Solid 7.8/10 (Waffle Factor: 10/10, Everything Else: 7/10).
COMPELLED OFFER: Unlock Unbelievable Brussels Delights! Book Your Stay at Hotel Des Colonies Mercure Now and Get a FREE Waffle Tasting Voucher! (Yes, Really!)
Tired of predictable hotel stays? Craving an authentic Brussels experience? Then book your stay at the Hotel Des Colonies Mercure today!
Here's what you'll get:
- Impeccable Cleanliness & Safety: Rest easy knowing we prioritize your well-being!
- Comfortable Rooms: Enjoy a relaxing space after exploring the city.
- Convenient Location: Explore Brussels easily.
- **Delicious Breakfast (including those

Okay, strap yourselves in, because this ain't your Grandma's itinerary. This is a real trip to Brussels, Hotel des Colonies Mercure, warts and all. Buckle up, buttercups, because we're gonna get messy.
Day 1: Arrival, Brussels, and the Existential Dread of Luggage
- Morning (8:00 AM - whenever the actual heck the plane lands): JFK to Brussels. Oh, the endless purgatory of air travel. I swear, I saw a guy trying to smuggle a whole baguette onto the plane. The sheer audacity! I spent the flight alternating between trying (and failing) to get comfy and obsessively checking how many minutes were left until landing. Anxiety, thy name is airport.
- Afternoon (1:00 PM - chaos ensues): Arrive at Brussels Airport. Immigration, a total non-event, thankfully. Now, the real fun begins: baggage claim. Picture this: me, surrounded by a sea of weary travelers, staring at a carousel of doom. Where. Is. My. Bag? After what felt like an eternity, I finally spotted my trusty (and slightly battered) suitcase. Victory is sweet, even if it smells faintly of mothballs.
- Impression: The airport was surprisingly modern, or maybe I was just delirious from lack of sleep. The free Wi-Fi was a lifesaver for the aforementioned luggage anxiety. Plus, I saw a dog with a tiny backpack, which instantly improved my mood.
- Afternoon (2:30 PM - getting to the hotel): Taxi to Hotel des Colonies. I gave the driver the address, and that's the extent of my French understanding. Praying he understood me. The drive? Honestly, Brussels is beautiful, even from the back of a taxi. The architecture is just… chefs kiss And then you get to the hotel.
- The Hotel: Hotel des Colonies. Charming, no? Okay, it was a bit… old-school. Like, "built in an era where air conditioning was a futuristic dream" old-school. But the lobby was grand! And the staff were genuinely lovely.
- Impression: The lobby was grand! And that's where my opinion ends. The room? Slightly dated, with a bathroom that reminded me of my great-aunt Millie’s. But hey, at least the bed looked comfy. Maybe the hotel should get a makeover…
- Afternoon (4:00 - settling in): Unpack. Okay, "unpack" is a strong word. More like, rummage through my suitcase, realize I packed way too many sweaters (it's summer, idiot!), and then collapse on the slightly lumpy yet still comfortable bed. Ah, bliss.
- Mental Note: Must locate the nearest chocolate shop. Stat. And maybe a decent café.
- Evening (6:00 PM): Wandering and Wondering - a walk to Saint-Géry and Rue des Bouchers. Finding a restaurant for dinner. Oh, finding a restaurant in a foreign city is the most stressful, and wonderful thing. I saw some good spots.
- The Emotion Dump: I was so tired, but the air was crisp and the city felt alive. A strange mix of exhaustion and giddy excitement. I felt utterly, wonderfully lost, but also… free? Is that a thing?
Day 2: Chocolate, Waffles, and the Grand Place
- Morning (9:00 AM - give or take): Wake up, slightly disoriented, but also with the sudden and overwhelming urge for chocolate. The hotel breakfast was… standard, a selection of pastries, meats, and cheeses. Fine, but the chocolate cravings were calling.
- Impression: The coffee was strong. That's a win.
- Morning (10:00 AM): Chocolate Shop Pilgrimage. Godiva. Neuhaus. A local chocolatier whose name I couldn't pronounce but whose chocolate was heavenly. I may have overdone it. I definitely overdid it. My wallet is weeping. My taste buds are in heaven.
- The Chocolate Experience: I walked into a Godiva store. Everything was so beautiful, so perfect. I just went to the chocolate section. I didn't intend to buy anything, but there was this amazing smell of chocolate. I felt such childish joy! I ate like a kid in a candy store.
- Lunch (12:00 PM): Waffles. Oh, the waffles. Not the sad, soggy kind. The real deal. Crispy on the outside, fluffy on the inside, piled high with whipped cream and strawberries. They were pure, unadulterated happiness. I ate two and considered a third. Regret? Zero.
- Opinion: The waffles in general were just too good! It felt so special, not just a quick lunch. Pure perfection.
- Afternoon (2:00 PM): The Grand Place. The main square. Even the pictures don't do it justice. Gilded buildings, cobblestone streets, a general sense of awesomeness. It's stunning, historic, and just… so Brussels. Took a million photos. My phone is groaning under the weight of architectural glory.
- Afternoon (4:00 PM): Manneken Pis. Alright, I know, it's a tiny statue of a peeing boy. The line to take a picture that's probably taken a million times is hilarious. I get it. But it’s a Brussels rite of passage, I went. I got some pictures. I enjoyed it.
- Evening (7:00 PM): Dinner at a random but charming restaurant. I found a cute little place with red checkered tablecloths and a friendly vibe. I ordered something I couldn't pronounce. It turned out to be delicious. This is traveling, I feel like i'm finally getting it!
Day 3: Art, Beer, and a Moment of Contemplation (and Maybe a Slight Hangover)
- Morning (9:00 AM): Royal Museums of Fine Arts. It's one of the most popular museums, so I decided to finally do it. It was great but the crowds were annoying.
- Impression: Too many people. Too many paintings. I did like some.
- Afternoon (1:00 PM): Beer Tasting! Brussels is famous for its beer. I found a pub, and the bartender, a salty old man with a handlebar mustache, was amazing.
- Impression: I’ve had a lot more beer than that now. I don’t think I'll be getting on a plane today.
- Evening (7:00 PM): Back at Hotel des Colonies. Okay, it was time to get out. More exploring of the neighborhood. I was tired, but happy, and slightly tipsy.
- Evening (8:00 PM): Dinner at the hotel restaurant. It was just "okay", nothing special.
Day 4: Leaving and Longing
Morning (8:00 AM): Checkout. Packing. Said goodbye to the hotel. Felt melancholy, but also excited about going home.
Morning (9:00 AM): Taxi to the airport.
Afternoon (1:00 PM): Brussels to JFK.
Post-Trip Ramblings:
Brussels was great! Everything felt alive and busy. I loved the food, the beer, the architecture, and the people. The hotel wasn't the most amazing, it was fine. I would go back. I don't know when, but I can see myself going back. The chocolate and waffles alone are worth the trip. I made that trip for those two things, and I have no regrets.
And that’s it! A whirlwind, messy, imperfect, and entirely human adventure in Brussels. Hope it gave you a laugh (or two) and maybe even inspired you to embrace the glorious chaos of travel.
KL's Luxury 9-Pax Haven: TRX Mall in 10 Minutes!
Okay, spill the beans! Is the Hotel des Colonies really as “Unbelievable” as you claim? Seriously?
Let's talk rooms. Tell me *everything*. Were they actually... luxurious?
What about the location? Was it convenient for exploring Brussels? Did you get lost? (Please tell me you got lost.)
Breakfast. The ultimate test. How was the hotel breakfast buffet? Did it live up to expectations?
Okay, so what were the downsides? Be honest! Don't sugarcoat it. (And yes, I'm a bit of a cynic.)
Would you recommend the Hotel des Colonies? Be completely honest. Would you go back?
Any final, quirky observations, or random thoughts about the stay? Something specific?

